“You are not alone”…. This is one of my close friends favourite phrases.
As human beings we have a basic need to connect with others. But perhaps when we need this connection most, during times of distress and suffering, we can become locked in our own heads, thoughts circling and spiralling towards our worst fears. With this comes loss of perspective and loneliness, and it can feel hard to find a way out.
Albert Einstein described our sense of being separate as a delusion and a prison. And even during these days of lockdown, evidence of our interconnectedness is everywhere.
One mindfulness exercise I like which reminds me of connection involves watching the kettle boil when making a cup of tea. It doesn’t take more than a minute or two to boil a kettle but during that time I think about all the people involved in the steps to get my cup of tea to me, the tea growers and pickers, the tea bag makers, the water suppliers, the people that made the raw materials for my kettle, the electricity workers, the potters who made my cup …the list is huge, and that’s just for one very small routine in my day. And all the people in this huge web of connectedness have their own stuff going on too, their worries, fears and hopes just like us.
Recognising this reality can be transforming. When we lift our heads from our own difficulties, if only for a few minutes, and see the interconnectedness all around us, something very special happens… we begin to see ourselves as part of something much bigger and we can feel a little lighter, a little more able to cope and that’s soothing for the soul.
Charlotte Green is a qualified fertility coach, with over 10 years of experience, in supporting clients on their journey to parenthood. She brings a wealth of experience, empathy and compassion to her transformative sessions which she provides via zoom. You can find out more about the support she offers here.